I Stopped Doing These 7 Things When I Got Into A Relationship & I Seriously Regret It

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I’m happily married to the man of my dreams, but for a while there, I was spending a lot of time reminiscing about my single days. I eventually realized it had nothing to do with dating other people and everything to do with the fact that I’d stopped doing the things that make me happy. Here are a few things I recently got back into and that make me a much more fulfilled person and partner.


When I was single, I used to go to shows by myself all the time. I loved the feeling of dancing by myself, getting lost in a crowd and not worrying about keeping track of anyone. Going to a concertwith my husband (or my friends) is one of my favorite things to do and we have a lot of similar tastes, but just because I love doing it doesn’t mean I should stop seeing music alone too. It’s a completely different experience and I missed that freeing feeling. I always come back feeling rejuvenated.


There were times during my single days when I wanted to go out to eat but didn’t really feel like meeting up with anyone, so I’d go it alone. I enjoyed the solo time to simply treat myself or observe the interactions going on around me. It felt fancy to be at a restaurant alone. I felt interesting when I’d tell the host that I wanted a table for one. It was something that was a little challenging to do at first, but I always felt like it brought me more confidence. Yes, I’m alone. Yes, it’s intentional. Yes, I like it. Awesome, right?


My husband would tell you I meet people everywhere I go, so I can’t say I completely stopped chatting up people I don’t know. However, I did stop actually developing real connections with strangers. I’m not talking about people from work or new friendships that develop from acquaintances over time. In my single days, I might meet someone at a bookstore and end up taking a painting class with him or her that night. For some reason, when I got into a relationship, I adopted the mentality that a new friendship with a stranger wasn’t acceptable. New friend hangout doesn’t mean date, and closing myself off to new friendships was holding me back from making authentic connections with people.


When my husband and I started sharing our finances (years before ever getting married), I started feeling guilty whenever I’d spend money on something I didn’t really need (like a gorgeous vegan leather jacket that I still think about). Retail therapy is real! I’m not looking to blow all of our money on shoes or anything, but a little splurge on a vintage dress to treat myself every once in a while is definitely fine and makes me feel beautiful. My husband and I have never had any issues with responsibly spending our money so I don’t know why I stopped treating our money as mine too.

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